My After 10 days Updates

it has been 10 days since my last post... yes, yes i have been lazy... but more importantly, i have nothing to write... no word to say... i guess i just not in the mood to do anything... or to share anything... kinda feels like i want to hide and sleep there... forever...

it came to my mind the other day... kinda creepy if you read it... but it came naturally in my head for some reason.... that i was driving, and if i just hit a truck hard enough, ill be dead... and i can be in peace... and start a new life in my new form, new era, new background etc etc etc... yes yes, i believe of reincarnation....

but yea, that's my dark side... apart from that, i've been sick in the past 5 days... it started from the throat... then headache, fever, runny nose and stuffy ear.... yes yes, im still kinda sick. still weak and stuffy... but if this the payback for what i've done in the past then im glady to endure it. karma is karma and no one is perfect (sorry kelvin, u should know that by now).

then what else... just trying to survive... do everything, smile, talk, walk, work... but it feels like an empty shell. u know... like u dont feel anything.. just blank... even now.. still blank... not even happy... grumpy most likely.... but trying to smile...

apart from all those dark gloomy news of me, im studying again. but nothing heavy cos i dont want to go to uni and sit in the lecture room and so on, so i decided to do online study. diploma instead of master. at least i can do this for 6 months, and i can still do work full time, dont eed to worry about time and such... save so much time for me...

try to keep my self busy... turned out that many people has been feeling all emo in the past week aswell... so not just me... bu they are mostly related to girl problem... so ya... just try to be there and so on....

feels like something is missing....

and apparently im oing to organise a hen's night party... but that is still ages away.. like next year... in jkt... where there wont be any strippers... and then yea... that kind of stuff wont be appropriate in jkt... so probably there will only be a dinner, followed by clubbing activity..

i think, that's all for now... like i said... it is blank....

xoxo,
Aby